It’s come to our attention that rain is not everyone’s cup of tea. We understand. There’s been an ongoing propaganda campaign to besmirch rain. Since you were a kid you’ve been targeted with specific messaging designed to influence your perceptions of precipitation. You’ve been programmed to think negatively about rain.
It’s our hope that real data and thoughtful conversation may remedy this anti-rain sentiment and restore your natural balance. We know a lot of pluviophiles today. The transition isn’t easy for everyone. Some try various raincoats and umbrella things. Some went right to the poncho and never looked back. But regardless of how they got there, I think you’d find these “rain lovers” particularly bright and optimistic.
Remember: “Rain, rain go away…” You were taught that mantra. You didn’t invent that. But they’d make you chant it all afternoon. It was an insidious thought bomb. Video games for you. Every cloud has a silver lining. Rain sucks but hopefully happiness will come again another day. Aw, poor me, it’s raining. The perpetrators did that to you.
“April showers bring May flowers” operates much the same way. Oh sure, May flowers sound nice. But what about the virtues of spring showers? See the subtle indoctrination you’ve been subjected to? Perhaps it will shock you to learn that it’s the sunlight and microbes that will bring those flowers too. The point is that it’s a manufactured phrase that’s fraught with anti-rain sentiment.
April Showers Sale
We’re only here to help. Your inner monkey knows exactly what we’re talking about. The smell of fresh spring rain, the rejuvenation, real nature sounds of a billion rain drops. Here’s a proverb for you: “Two lovers in the rain have no need of an umbrella.” Let that soak in. That’s from Japan, home of forest bathing, zen and a healthy attitude toward rain.
Unconvinced? Let me tell you a little story about a young girl who loved drawing and exploring. She was an avid reader and a bit of a loner. Well, she grew up watching nature and studying how it worked. In 1962 she wrote a book called Silent Spring and it inspired a huge environmental movement that spread all over the world. In fact, it led to the creation of the US Environmental Protection Agency, which was really good while it lasted. Remarkably, she retained her childhood sense of wonder and left us with these wise words:
“A rainy day is the perfect time for a walk in the woods.” ~ Rachel Carson
Isn’t it time you reconsider your relationship with rain? It will open new opportunities. We invite you to don a Cleverhood and experience the magical world of rain. And in commemoration of this special time, we’re happy to offer a 20% discount off our rainwear for you and yours. Just look for our banner up top or contact us at firstname.lastname@example.org.